I have a grin all too devilish to forget, love. I’m decent-looking and oh-so-humble. A newly polished graduate who has practised the subtle art of the cheeky miniskirt tease. “Worldly,” as per some of my fonder Tinder compliments.

What lives have I lived? Let’s save that for proper introductions. For my long-time admirers, my answer may still rub you the right way…not counting thumbs, I think I have 8 lives left.

My time with you will be real. A memorable upscale treat, no less, and zest with mutual affection and respect. I know my way around a funny bone or two. I’m a pun-lovin’, long-limbed lynx with warm buns and delightful perks at surface level. Yourself?

A postscript of date ideas for us—

Dinner. Let us, as they say, slurp on them 'dumb thicc' dumpling juices.

Musicals/Theatre/StripClub/Concerts/Festivals/Raves. If you know, you know.

Spa date. Underrated date activity, in my opinion. My range in moans is rather impressive.

Netflix and chilling homemade ice-cream. Typically followed by a Dutch Baby powdered in sugar. I’ll leave you free rein over naming our love-child.

The farmer's market this Saturday. I’ve apparently hit peak pretentious snack lord reputation. Identify me in Pusha T’s ‘Sociopath’. Let’s pick up fresh Camembert and that sweet honeycomb drip in preparation of this charcuterie board I’ve been day-drooling over.

Hire one of my girlfriends. I’ll be watching.

Game of badminton. If you didn’t bring your racket, fear not - I’m packing enough for the two of us.

Sprinting/Naruto running to the end of the hotel hall with you.

Still reading? — https://t.co/ukZq4rK6P2?amp=1